because

I 

I have silently walked and seen what the world would be like without me

I have been a ghost 

I saw Susan alone

not talking to me

because i was not there

I have seen the circle where I could have been

still whole but a petal missing

I see the world now without you, and no one knows. 

there is no space 

no puzzle piece missing

it has been filled

with raging green leaves and 

wild loneliness

it has been filled with every gift life has to offer

soft kisses,
frosted cake, skinned knees
cement buildings
boarders, sweating and waiting
and knowing
of the bullets that fly through walls
and flesh

II

Because the earth loves your shit

God loves death 

life likes violence

and violence loves you

because every part of you

is made from exploding stars

The energy of the sun flies out 

of your mouth with every word,

kind or curse 

Every part of your body is sacred

every fold and crease 

every sign and moan

because worms love things that rot

mold has a party on your crust of bread

because pee makes your garden green and 

rotten tomatoes plant seeds

that grow 

when the soil warms
because old cars and sheets of metal left in the woods rust

back into the soil

because our first living relation was bacteria 

because mosquitoes suck my blood

and I kill them on your forehead

because my arms long to hold you when you cry

My voice longs to wail with yours

because to feel is to know

because describing the world sounds like a metaphor 

but it is not.